why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Come share oat with me in your robe
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
