You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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