Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Randomize
