the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
