I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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