Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
