There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Randomize