i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
did you just send me my own nude
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Randomize
