u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
