whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
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