Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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