are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
party gras won. party gras always wins.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
