You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
