A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
