I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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