She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
