I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Just high enough for therapy.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
