We're like a lot better than the average bears
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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