I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
