what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
barbara walters just said penis...
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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