:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
