Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize
