Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
