K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
