yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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