you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Randomize
