i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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