he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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