yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize