I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
