New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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