if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
