I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
