I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
