I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
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