Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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