Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Randomize