Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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