did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
