Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
