I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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