For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
