Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
