we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
