Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
