sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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