i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
