u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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