3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize