we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
You know, be my cock's hype man.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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